It’s History, Just Let It Go

19 04 2008

My family…well, where to begin…My uncle, we’ll call him George…him and my mother have never gotten along…from the stories ever heard, even when they were kids they didn’t get along…more so, than just normal sibling squabbles…This bugs me, mostly, because, well, they won’t let it go…well in all fairness, my mother, just doesn’t really like people, but she never talks about my uncle (his wife, yes, but that I’ll save for a little later)…I still hear stories about how my mother “stole” George’s truck one night and went out joy riding with her friends, and then returned it with a dent, I’m not sure if she offered to pay to have it fixed…heck, she may have taken it herself, later, to get it fixed, I don’t know…it’s a one-sided story…I also get told about how she’d borrow his truck and return it with an empty tank of gas…annoying, yes…but seriously, get over it…Now, these stories all took place before she had three kids…she had my older brother at 18…so even assuming someone was babysitting my brother, all of this happened when she was in her late teens…she’s now 45…so seriously, time for people just to let it go already… I think my mom, was probably pretty wild as a kid/teen…but somewhere in there she decided it was time to grow up, she had 3 kids to raise…that’s why she ditched my father (also more on that later)…

 

My aunt (the evil aunt), George’s wife, is a bitch. There really is just no other way to put it…and let me tell you people, I don’t use that word loosely…if you knew me in person, you’d know that I NEVER say that word, except when it comes to her…she told me once when I was 12 or 13 that she’d fix up a room for me and let me move in because my mother was so mean to me…now, my mother being mean to me…where’d she get that? Well, because I’d vent about her to my granny (who lived with them at the time) and my aunt would be in the room, she thought I was talking to her and my granny, really, I was just stuck with the aunt…But at 12…most teenage girls don’t get along with there mother…I didn’t get along with much of anyone at that age…it’s your rebellion starting…and the last thing an aunt should say, is let me move you in…now maybe, you can come visit any time you need to get a way or, you can come over or call and talk any time you need…even at 12 I knew what she said was wrong…she just has always wanted a daughter, she has 2 sons, and for a very long time she had no other nieces, so…she kept trying to “adopt” me…for Christmas she loved going shopping for me, I’d get all kinds of stuff, my brothers would get a few boring things…nothing really great…I hated that…I’m a protective sister…even if my little brother has been bigger than me since we were in middle school, and even though my older brother is 4 years older than me…I want what’s best for my brother’s…I don’t want to be treated special from them…being born female should give me no special rights or privileges over them…(first time you’ve heard a female say that, huh? I can hear the feminist crying now)…Part of my hatred for her started then.

 

Then she kicked my mother out of her house one time, I don’t even remember what for…I just remember them fighting and my mother saying “Let’s go, we’re not welcome here.” That may have been the time my aunt accused my mother of trying to sabotage her disability benefits…My aunt is not at all disabled…a little mental, or depressed, maybe, but not disabled, she’s lazy…she’s fine if it’s something she wants to do, but she doesn’t want to work…she remodels her house about ever year and a half…I mean really remodels…she’s strips all the cabinets and repaints them…she redoes the counter tops…all by herself…disabled? I think not….Anyways, she told my mother one time that the Social Security office had received an anonymous letter from someone proving that she was not disabled…and (oh it gets so much better than that…)that the social security office gave her a copy of the surveillance tape, and she could tell that it was my mother who went in to the office and gave them that letter….now come on…how many federal office do you know that just give up surveillance tapes?? And at the time, my mother was student teaching and working full-time, while raising the three of us…when would she have had time??

 

What really bugs me though…is they are so much against my mother that begins to effect everyone else, specifically my granny…they are so against helping each other, that they don’t want to help my granny because they think it might help my mother…that’s just wrong.

 

That’s part of why I’m so stressed over this party…they spent my whole childhood judging how my mom raised us…they thought everything she did was wrong…I may not have agreed with everything she did, but she did a pretty damn good job of raising us….none of us are in prison, or knocked up living in trailer parks, so we’ve done better than 65% of our high school….but I know that they will judge everything about this party…and that’s part of why I want it to be so perfect (besides that, I’m a perfectionist)…because I know they’re going to talk…and I want to them to have only nice things to say…even though I know, even if they like it they’re going to say “With her for a mother, I don’t know how that child turned out so well.”…I’ve heard it before, and I smile to myself, because I know that they were wrong, they’ve been wrong, and we’ve risen above that…I’m a much better person than they are…but damn it, I still want everything to be perfect next Saturday….but more importantly, I wish they would all just get over it…just move on and let the past go.

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4 responses

19 04 2008
dreamer0507

Problems come and problems go…sadly some problems don’t want to go away…so you just have to deal with them.Even if they start saying bad things about the party, don’t mind them. Just imagine how happy your grandmother it going to be about the party and all will be fine:).

19 04 2008
sosupercilious

I get what you’re saying about family – you’d think that *because* they’re family, they would be more loving and considerate. And you just expect so much more from them. A lot of times they disappoint. But people are people despite them being family and they’ll be mean, rude and selfish regardless.

I really hope the party turns out well! For yours and your granny’s sake. No matter what they say, you’re still a billion times better than they are.

20 04 2008
pseudonymblog

You know, as I read your blog I got to thinking…I think we have a tendancy to hold stuff against family a whole lot longer than we do other people, which is truly sad, it should really be the other way around. It should be easier to forgive family…we are so quick to remember the bad stuff, yet so very very slow to remember all the good stuff our family has done.

21 04 2008
Sarcastica

Unfortunately, you can’t force them to make up. You can tell them all that they’re being ridiculous and stupid, and MAYBE then they’ll realize that they are…but other then that, its up to them.

When it comes to family arguments, mine is full of them. But at the very least, it teaches you lessons…like how to make sure your kids in the future know that family IS important.

P.S Thanks for stopping by my site, I’m going to bookmark yours so I can come back 🙂 I enjoyed reading it!

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